Seriously.

I think I’ve OD’ed on human contact.

I’m ending the relationship (if it can even be called that) with the guy that I was dating. Seriously, dude. Phone calls every single day, more than once a day, and calling when you know damn well I am busy? Showing up at work almost every day?

Pushing for intimacy I clearly don’t want? Naked chick on the wall, right below the picture of Jesus?

You’re done.

Buh Bye.

The Sweet Life

I’m easing into my summer life. Between overtime, dating, cleaning, baking, and television, the proverbial plate is full.

It’s not yet June, so I don’t feel like I am wasting my summertime stuck in the house, so I am taking advantage of it while I can.

My favorite part of the brownies is the crispy part, so I figured out that if I make cookies of the mix, the whole thing is crispy. I’m really experimenting so that I can make baked goods for others, but the mistakes are still delicious enough to fatten me up.

I’m rediscovering the joy that is the novel; I had been reading books that were interesting, but not especially enjoyable. Non-fiction just doesn’t have that same sparkle for me. I love reading stories that capture cultures other than my own, which is why I loved Interperter of Maladies. After what I predict to be a short stay with 1984, a book I never read in school, I am finally reading The Gift of Asher Lev. I absolutely loved The Chosen and The Promise, so this should be quite the mental treat.

And then, of course, there is the matter of boys.

I don’t seek them out. As previously demonstrated, my life is both full and satisfying, but dating opportunities don’t need seeking out, something I wish had been true earlier in life. Imagine my surprise that in the ordinary course of events, some boys will just ask, simply because they are interested.

And there is fun to be had; dinners in which conversation, passionate conversation, is participated in by both parties. Movies that are mutually enjoyable, and that tense, but sweet moment at the end, when you wonder if he wants to, and he wonders if you want him to.

And of course the funny moments, when pressed for physical intimacy that goes beyond current familiarity.

“C’mon. Really kiss me.”

“This is the first date. What kind of ho do you think I am?”

Heresy?

Here’s a mini post that comes from a comment I made on that other blog I write for.

I believe that everything God does is about us, and nothing he does is about him.

Narcisistic? Maybe. But there is a scripture in Mormonism that I believe backs this theory up:

For behold, this is my work and my glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.”

And I think that perhaps when we view this at the macro level (e.g., mankind) instead of the micro level (ME ME ME ME), it doesn’t have any narcisistic tendencies. It’s all about Community. What I do to further God’s work isn’t important because I am saving myself, or making God happy (he’s already there), but because I am helping to further the work of the Kingdom, which is just a fancy way to say that I am helping everyone in the community.

It isn’t about getting to the Celestial Kingdom (or Heaven); when our faith in Christ is sure, we already know we will reach that goal. It’s about how many people we can take with us.

16 He saith to him again the second time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my sheep.

17 He saith unto him the third time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? Peter was grieved because he said unto him the third time, Lovest thou me? And he said unto him, Lord, thou knowest all things; thou knowest that I love thee. Jesus saith unto him, Feed my sheep.

Surry, Ben Buzy

The End is Near

I can feel it!

Summer.

Yes, it is chilly enough for a sweater today, but summer is coming in four days for me.

In one short day, I will have my two final papers written. In three short days, I will have all of my exams studied for. In four short days, all said exams will be taken.

So, yes, summer.

A summer full of reading, television, and organizing, and of course, writing and research.

It will be such a relief.