Cursed Week

It seems that this is the week that tragedy chooses to brandish its burn.

I know because this is the week that had been April Vacation when I was in school, and it is the week that precedes my birthday.

Oklahoma City Bombing.


And now Virginia Tech.

I’ve purposefully avoided most of the media coverage. I just don’t want to know. I don’t know how to reconcile optimism with the world we actually live in.

But its impossible to avoid all of the news. Most of my perspective on this comes from my Glenn Beck obsession. I can turn off the news, but not the Glenn.

Anyway, I digress.

I’m left with a feeling of despair.

Or, more precisely, why bother?

What is the point of all the cooking, and cleaning, and studying? What does it all do, besides keep me wrapped up in a world of contrivances?

None of this life I lead feels real. It feels artificial and constructed. I don’t do things because I have this short life to live, and to feel, and to learn.

I do it because I need 22 more credits to get my degree. I do it because the rent is due. I do it because it is what I perceive to be most acceptable to society, whatever that is, and why ever I think that is important.

And that just seems wrong.

2 responses to “Cursed Week


    From Anglican bishop N.T. Wright: “Face it: to deny God’s wrath is, at bottom, to deny God’s love. When God sees humans being enslaved – and do please go and see the film
    Amazing Grace’ as soon as you get the chance – if God doesn’t hate it, he is not a loving God. (It was the sneering, sophisticated set who tried to make out that God didn’t get angry about that kind of thing, and whom Wilberforce opposed with the message that God really does hate slavery.) When God sees innocent people being bombed because of someone’s political agenda, if God doesn’t hate it, he isn’t a loving God. When God sees people lying and cheating and abusing one another, exploiting and grafting and preying on one another, if God were to say, ‘never mind, I love you all anyway’, he is neither good nor loving. The Bible doesn’t speak of a God of generalized benevolence. It speaks of the God who made the world and loves it so passionately that he must and does hate everything that distorts and defaces the world and particularly his human creatures. And the Bible doesn’t tell an abstract story about people running up a big debit balance in God’s bank and God suddenly, out of the blue, charging the whole lot to Jesus. The Bible tells a story about the creator God calling a people through whom he would put the world right, living with that covenant people even when they themselves went wrong, allowing them to become the place where the power of evil would do its worst, and preparing them all through for the moment when, like the composer finally stepping on stage to play the solo part, he would come and take upon himself, in the person of his Son, the pain and shame, yes, the horror and darkness, yes, but also, in Matthew, Mark, Luke and John, in Paul and Acts and Hebrews and 1 Peter and Revelation, in Ignatius and Irenaeus and Augustine and Aquinas, in Luther and Calvin and Cranmer and Hooker, in Herbert and Donne and Wesley and Watts – he would take upon himself the condemnation which, precisely because he loves us to the uttermost, he must pronounce over that deadly disease we call sin. To deny this, as some would do today as they have for hundreds of years, is to deny the depth and weight of sin and the deeper depth and heavier weight of God’s redeeming love. The word of the cross is folly to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.”

    John Gardner, former Sec. of HEW: “Particularly for young people, the sense of helplessness is intensified by the huge, glistening machinery of our society. It hums with intimidating smoothness. How could any individual be needed much?”

    John Powell, S.J.: “Who am I? What is the worth of my person and my life? What is the value of my life for others? These questions must be answered to insure a meaningful life.”

  2. First one to wish you a Happy Birthday!

    Love ya much. 😉

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